Friday, June 26, 2009

I Don't Usually Swing This Way

...but this (R) knows what the whole business should be about.

If the rest of Governor Rell's policies are half as clean a blend of American idealism and plain ol' common sense, then the people of Connecticut are lucky.

For once
.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

It's DIV-Licious!

Tonight! 8mhpshth PM! Deep In Vein! The Charleston!

You want to go so bad, it doesn't even matter that this is an epic case of late notice...

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Slide Show!

All right, gather 'round my little kiddies. By...um, regular demand, I have finally documented the critically acclaimed house lights I built for "Machines x7" (now playing at HERE Arts Center, check ovationtix.com for ticketing inform...). Behold! The electrical fires that could have been!

Leaf blower, prairie-doggin' a 40w! Yeah, I said it.

Caution sign. I actually wanted to use this in its standard upside down 'V' shape, but the other half was assimilated into the Borg...er, I mean, the set, so I made do with the one.

Picnic cooler. For those light lunches. Buh-dum!

Milk crate. Yup.

Small fan. Getting the motor out of this was actually quite the bitch. In the end, a not-at-all-frustrated lob down an 18-step flight of stairs did the trick. (Electrician's note: this method works on almost every household appliance.)

Hard hat. I was very pleased with this one since the shell actually gives off quite a bit of yellow light.

Space heater. What I like most about this one is that I was able to use the metal lining as a reflector for the two bulbs. This was also the trickiest piece because we use the heater during the winter months, which meant I couldn't just deconstruct it (i.e., no trip down the stairwell). So, this is still a functioning space heater, to be put back into service soon after it comes out of the air.

M&M dispenser: but more like if it had been made in China; i.e., a possible fire hazard, but for children most of all. What can I say? I love my job.

Printer. After so many battles with this thing's ill-tempered brethren, I admit I took a certain sadistic satisfaction in driving in the two drywall screws holding the socket to it.

And finally, the umbrella.

I present the above last, because the lesson I want to leave you with is that 18 gauge zip cord powering basic type-A sockets with only a sliver of electrical tape between live current and the open air is the perfect way to stay warm and dry in a downpour, while adding only pennies to your monthly utilities bill.

On the upside, in a lightning storm this thing powers itself.

Go on, give 'er a try!

Is It A Dead/Live Kitteh?

My more metaphysically-minded loved ones can expect this special gift from me this holiday season.



Tuesday, June 16, 2009

XXXI

One score and eleven.

If I were Jesus I'd be one year into my ministry. As my love and I concluded, though, I'm quite happy not to be Jesus, because I would only get to hang out with her for two more years.

And I'd have to put up with all those Mary's. Seriously, I much prefer Maureens.

All right now, go have a lovely day and I'll pretend it was in my honor.

Monday, June 8, 2009

I See The Light(s) -- Updated!

I am officially coming up for air after close to three solid weeks of summoning light from darkness. It's not easy; God only said it was.

What can I say? He has an image to protect.

And now apparently, I do too. The relevant part:
Similarly terrific is the immersive design work, which is so of a piece that it's hard to find the seams between sound (James Sugg), "music machines" (Sean Mattio), machine design (Steven and Billy Blaise Dufala), scenic design (Hiroshi Iwasaki), lighting design (James Clotfelter), and house lighting design (Marlon Hurt).
Aroint thee, cherry of my critical mention as a designer! Begone, I say!

The house lights he mentions are ones I devised and constructed (with some help) and include such delights as the body of a leaf blower, a hard hat, an upside down picnic cooler, a space heater, and a small area fan--just to name some of many--in each of which I found a suitable place to wire a 40 watt incandescent. None of which, so far, has shorted and rained fiery plastic down on the audience gathered below.

It occurs to me that maybe the reviewer was using this mention to thank me in his own way for another evening at the theater spent un-napalmed.

Mr. Perlman, sir, you are welcome.

~~~

UPDATE: After 9/11, I went searching for voices to help explain to me just what the hell happened. One of those voices was an anonymous blogger based in Philly named Atrios. Almost eight years later, he's one of the biggest voices in the left blogosphere and apparently a fan of the show.

This is equivalent to watching "Good Morning, America" for nearly a decade, only to wake up one morning and find the anchors waving at you through the TV. Awesome!

UPDATE II: I realized that I never quite explained myself. I was actually the Master Electrician on this show, which is a glorified way of saying "the guy who makes sure everything turns on." After all the collective time and effort spent making sure that Mr. Clotfelter's lights look awesomely trashy (or trashily awesome; this show would welcome either), the idea of the house lights as their own entity was just an amusing afterthought.

Apparently, people appreciated my afterthinking. Cool.

Chuck Liddell Gets His...Ahem, Heart Broken

MMA has hit the mainstream so hard it's even knocked itself silly.

And honest kudos to Liddell who, despite his string of recent losses, is at least still winning at the bank.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Random Thought: Storytelling

To all the playwrights and screenwriters who, I'm sure, do not read this blog: one of the worst tools you can use to firm up your invention is to have a character remark about how "you can't make this stuff up" or some such.

Just...please, don't do it. Because it's a lie. You can make it up. How do I know? Because you did. And then you told an actor to pretend that you didn't. That's what actors do. But that doesn't mean you need to make them give the lie to what you do. Calling attention to the fiction of the fiction that we're watching is just not smart strategy. I'm only thinking of you here.

Okay, run off and play...